Been There, Done That: Family Reunion

Story by Jon Stalnaker AKA The Studebaker Dude

Well, you don’t see many family reunions these days, but last week was about as close as it gets anymore. At least that’s the way it is in my family. To celebrate my wife Carlene’s birthday, we had Jessica and Trevor fly out from Arizona to surprise her. But that was last week’s story. Daughter Jillian and hubby Tim came from Depew and brought food and drinks for the big birthday bash on Friday. Amy came from Oktaha, and we counted her as family, too. Jessica and Trevor had been spoiling us with food and drink all week. I don’t drink much alcohol, but I do for special occasions, and this was just about as special of an occasion as we have seen in a long time. I think I drank too much, but I’m still here and I didn’t have to drive.

Jessica, Carlene, and Trevor

I grew up in a big family and we have had our share of family reunions, mostly on my father’s side. He was the fourth of four and I was one of eleven grandchildren – if I counted correctly. There were plenty on my mother’s side too. She was the third of four and I was one of, I think, twelve grandchildren on her side. Families were much bigger in those days as birth control was an unheard-of concept back then. We had a few mixed get-togethers but they were typically either mom’s or dad’s families. People lived closer together back then too. I remember family get-togethers on my dad’s side almost weekly. His sister, my aunt DiDi, lived across the street, and Grammy and Papa a few doors down the street from her. He had another sister that lived across town and his youngest sister lived in Sacramento. The rest of us all lived in Stockton. We would sit around and tell jokes and stories and on occasion watched the slide shows of Aunt E’s travel excursions. Being the youngest of the grandchildren, I soaked up all that wisdom but mostly played with the great-grandchildren. I was older than all of them, but not by very much.

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The Ladies in the kitchen; Jessica, Carlene, Amy, and Jillian.
Chef Trevor

We had a few reunions in the past couple of decades. One of them was a 50th birthday surprise organized by my daughter Jillian. After that, they were mostly get-togethers after funerals. I’m still haunted by a comment made by my cousin Kathy at my sister Viki’s funeral. She said, “we should get together just for a family reunion next time instead of just meeting at funerals”. Everyone agreed that was a great idea, but the next time we got together was for Kathy’s funeral.

I don’t expect that I will ever see a family reunion for my branch of the family tree. As a matter of fact, I have never been in the presence of all six of my children at one time. Something I am least proud of. If that ever happened, I would be delighted beyond words, but I’m not holding my breath. The separation is not my desire, and my door is always open to any of them. Maybe one day…As ashamed as I am to even admit such a thing, I don’t think I am alone in my misery. It seems to me that a dysfunctional family is the norm nowadays. Sad isn’t it. I’ve got children and grandchildren in multiple states and even multiple countries. So, we will have to settle for visits a few at a time, that’s why we love our house so much. It’s nice having a guest suite for just such an occasion. Last week was one of them. 

Saturday was a sad day when Jessica and Trevor had to go home. At least they moved from California to Arizona, that’s a little closer. Jillian and Tim come by often and that is a blessing. Amy comes by frequently too and we like that as well. Grandma keeps us at home, so we don’t get out much. I’m not complaining, it is an honor to be able to take care of her. I’m so proud of my wife, she’s a great hostess and a great care giver. But last week she was the special princess. We all appreciated the opportunity to love on her and tell her just that. She deserves it. I’m such a lucky man.

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